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How to Create a Peaceful Home

by Rebecca Eanes

I truly believe that peace on earth starts at home, and that's why my website and my books have one focus, to promote peace in families. Peace must begin inward – we must first find peace in ourselves. We can then extend that peace to our partners and children, onward to other family members and our communities, and peace will then have a ripple effect out into society.

There is much we can do to cultivate peace. For the sake of brevity, I will outline what I have found to be most fruitful in my own journey to peace.

Creating Peace Within Yourself:

Know your story. Understand your past and how it has shaped you. Decide if you were shaped in a way that you do not want to be today and do the inner work needed to bring about healing and positive change. (There are many books on this topic to choose from.)

Identify your triggers. What makes you feel angry, depleted, or anxious? Write down patterns and address ways to avoid these triggers or change your reactions to them. Good questions to ask yourself are 1) where did this trigger come from, 2) what does this tell me about myself or how I'm living my life, and 3) what can I do to deactivate this trigger and find peace?

Nurture your spirit. Seek spiritual peace with daily practice of prayer and meditation. Benefits are not only spiritual, but psychological and physiological as well.

Creating Peace Within Your Environment:

I believe home should be a haven – a place where everyone walks in and says, “Ahhh!” Here are a few simple steps to make your home feel more peaceful.



1. Clutter is an energy drain. Pare down and organize.

2. Decorate. Cheerful, inspiring décor does wonders. I recently redecorated my living room, adding pops of cheerful turquoise and a few calming decorations, and it's now my favorite space in the house. When my mood needs to shift, I go there.

3. Create physical spaces for self-soothing activities. For adults, a corner dedicated to your hobby, whether it be journaling, scrapbooking, sewing, reading, etc., is a nice space to go to. Allow children to design (or help design) their own soothing spaces. Perhaps a calming area for toddlers or a reading nook for older children.

4. Scents affect moods. Aromatherapy is getting quite a bit of attention, and for good reason. Research shows it relieves stress and promotes physical well-being.

5. Music is another reliever of stress and can quickly boost your mood. Incorporate soft background music for a peaceful effect.

Creating Peace Within Your Relationships

Peaceful communication is key to healthy relationships. Practice peaceful, non-violent communication with your spouse or partner as well as your children. How? Address others in the home respectfully. Show compassion. Disagree with empathy (put yourself in the other's shoes). Treat conflicts as opportunities to learn and grow. Use your words to build others up, pointing our their positive qualities.

Create a family mission together and decide upon which values you will uphold as a family unit. I have found this to be a helpful tool when correcting my own children. When one stepped outside the bounds, I would bring out our mission statement and go over our values, then help him to find ways in which he could stay within those bounds under the circumstance he was facing. The mission statement sets an overall tone for the family and gives clear direction so that everyone knows which path to stay on.

Siblings can and should have peaceful relationships with one another, and there is no room for teasing, fighting, or rivalry. For solutions to sibling rivalry, click here.

“What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family.” - Mother Teresa

Rebecca Eanes is the author of The Newbie's Guide to Positive Parenting and co-author of Positive Parenting in Action: The How-To Guide for Putting Positive Parenting Principles into Action in Early Childhood. She is the founder of www.positive-parents.org and creator of the Facebook community Positive Parenting: Toddlers and Beyond. ??Through her Facebook community and website, Rebecca reaches thousands of parents daily with the message that connection trumps coercion and love is most powerful motivator. She does not claim to be a parenting "expert" but writes parent-to-parent with the hope of inspiring others to create peaceful homes through positive parenting.

She is the grateful mother of two boys.

Posted on Oct 07, 2014

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